the inside track
| KINGS RACE SERIES ROUND FOUR | 4 March 2003 |
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2002 - 2003 RACE
SERIES - Round 4 North East League The first round went with seeding, although Sheffield 1, granted a poor York team victory after an untidy race; the Pope (5th racer for Sheffield) popped out of his binding after a energetic start from the gate. This resulted in the group being tied and it had to be re-run. The second round was hard fought as closely matched teams fought for position, with close finishes. Again results went largely with seeding, of notable improvement from the last round were Sunderland and Sheffield 2, whilst Northumbria lost ground. In the finals Newcastle 2 meet Sheffield 3 for 7th and 8th play-off. Newcastle won and this gave them vital points which meant that they leap-frog Northumbria 1 in the final placing after 4 rounds and take overall 6th place. 5th and 6th place was fought by Sheffield 2 and Durham 1 with Durham taking victory. Sunderland and Sheffield 1 raced off for 3rd and 4th place, Sunderland won and with it critical points, which meant they gained ground after a poor show last time out. Over the season they were 4th.
In the critical final, it was a predictable line up, with Sheffield Hallam and Newcastle in the start gates. It had all come down to the last race. Newcastle took an early lead and Hallam never caught up. So after 4 rounds an up-beat Newcastle walked away with the silverware. In the ladies competition there were 6 teams, which ran in a league format - all racing each other once on the night. Sunderland ladies were victorious all night and took 1st place, this only secured them 2nd place overall after 4 rounds, with Northumbria ladies picking up the trophy for having been coincident all season. (the finished 2nd on the night) In the boarding, 4 teams fought hard, each racing each other twice - once on each course. Northumbria were in a class of their own and un-defeated all night, they had also won the 3 previous rounds and deservedly walked away with the league trophy. Sheffield took the crate of Stella for there numerous fancy dress themes all starting with the letter 'P' - we had the Police, prostitutes, pimps, the Pope and politicians to name a few. The top teams will soon receive invitations to attend finals in the May. When they will be able to compete against the top teams from the other leagues, in skiing, boarding, drinking and fancy dress. Midlands League The mixed skiing was set to be tight between Nottingham university and their Poly counterpart, whilst the Loughborough ladies only had to go through the formality of not screwing up to take home the title and a "crate" of Babycham. Many toys were thrown from the Birmingham pram when it was discovered that their first mixed ski team had slipped from third to ninth place due to a disqualification in the first race of the evening, and were therefore given an early trip to the bar (not something students are renowned for arguing against). Aside from this the evening was pretty uneventful - students slid down the side of a hill, sometimes going around the poles (although for one boarder it all seemed a little too easy, having taken every gate on the wrong side and thus practically straight-lining the course), sometimes the racers on the red course won, sometimes it was those on the blue… and occasionally some people decided to try for extra points by wiping out the flagging official (that's usually the one holding the flags, but we were pretty tired too) who was protected by a mere traffic cone as the Swaddy staff couldn't be arsed to provide us with a finish gate. This continued until enough points had been accrued to provide a result so we could all retire from the windswept summit to the warmth of the bar and start necking some cheap (Nick certainly surpassed himself here!) and frankly quite nasty booze (for that is the only classification for it, although at a mere 4% this is also questionable!). In a once again disappointing turnout for the fancy dress, the competition was between Warwick, who we can only imagine managed to steal a pirates hat and an eye patch from a children's party, Nottingham Trent, who'd brought a variety of reflective jackets with "Trent Uni" duck-taped onto the back, or Birmingham who were wearing a sarong, a bikini and a rather too tasteful Hawaiian shirt between them - guys, I suggest that you speak to Mono Les from Southampton about his hairy coconuts if you want to try this again! However, it was decided that as they made the most effort (in comparison) Birmingham were awarded the keg of Stella. Maybe this will inspire a bit more imagination next year?
Wooden spoons were awarded to Nottingham Trent for truly sucking in the disciplines of both boarding and ladies skiing, and were perfectly within their rights to slope off in shame before the prize giving (although this automatically disqualified them from consideration in the fancy dress). Birmingham added the spoon for mixed skiing to their haul of Stella and nasty bubbly, which hopefully is some consolation for their earlier disappointment. Big shiny league trophies went to Nottingham for the mixed skiing (even though they lost this round to Trent) and snowboarding, whilst the Loughborough women took home their long-awaited trophy despite loosing out to Nottingham on the night for the first time this season. The next "silverware" up for grabs is at the Collegiates, so decide whether you're a shandy-drinking-southern-softie or a hole-dwelling-northern-inbred and measure your worth against that half of the country! Cheers on behalf of Will and all the random officials who've made the journey to Swaddy this year for being what is largely regarded the friendliest and most organised bunch of students in Britain. But you need to work on your fancy dress….! London & Southern League More importantly though, the real issue on everybody's mind was could somebody actually raise a reasonable challenge to Southampton and claim the prize for fancy dress. It was a clear from the attire on display that everybody was taking the whole thing very seriously. Leather and latex was the general theme, clearly minimum wind resistance would be a major factor in deciding the overall placings, and Southampton (led as ever by Mono Les) did not disappoint. Their team consisted of a variety of muff divers dressed in full wet suits (blow-up doll included!), and bikers looking like they had just stepped out of the Blue Oyster Bar.Apparently the Portsmouth crew had received a tip off and decided that turning back was the best possible course of action. So with only two race officials bothering to turn up it was on with the racing. Nick managed to secure the services of Barry (Imperial's designated driver for the evening) to help out with the impossible task of ensuring teams were in place at the right time, and to his credit managed very well - Ruth your services are in question! Anyway, onto the racing. Southampton 1 laid down the gauntlet, winning all their races in the first round. However, Kent, Skiworld and Cambridge were not giving up without a fight, all making light work of the opposition. Meanwhile in the ladies competition, Southampton and Holloway were leading the way, and the Kent boarders were once again showing the form that has seen them dominate this season's competition.
After the break Cambridge and Skiworld's challenge for the title began to fade. Kent once again cruised through their group, but Southampton were showing no signs of losing their bottle and even managed to provide their second team with a much needed victory which may yet see them qualify for finals. Even with that minor slip up though the scene was set for a Southampton v Kent head to head. With a 6 point lead going into the fourth round though Southampton had already secured overall victory. Rubbing salt into the wound they also won the final race of the season. With Southampton ladies also winning through in the ladies comp on the night the cross dressing kings (and mostly queens!) were looking for a clean sweep. However, a momentous victory by Les' mono team over the their boarding team meant that all three teams were tied. There was no alternative but to decide the final positions with a hastily arranged boat race. Kent, however, were not going to see their domination threatened and confidence was so high they even substituted their driver for one of their ladies. Southampton were fooled by her innocent looks though and the sexy Scot taking the final leg managed to destroy the hopes of the boys from the south coast. With all the places finally determined there was only one more competition to judge. This was by far the easiest decision of the evening though, with the poorest fancy dress turn out of the season (you'll have to do better next year). Such was the lack of competition from the others Jim decided that the prize for "being Southampton University" should be awarded to Southampton University! Cheers folks, see you all at finals on May 10th. Stop Press North West In the Skier Team Parallels only one point separate Manchester and Leeds, ahead of a field jostling for their places at the National Finals in May. The first round went as expected with seeding, with entertainment provided by Chris (Leeds 3) with his enthusiastic up slope running on skis before he flopped! And Matt (Leeds 2) for this fine display of grass skiing. The second round was hard fought as closely matched teams fought for position, with close finishes. Again results went largely with seeding and the overall positions changed little on the night. What was crucial was a hard fought final between Manchester and Leeds. Manchester took an early lead, but Leeds came back at them and made them fight for their win and the overall league winner's trophy. In the ladies competition, 4 teams fought hard, each racing each other twice - once on each course. Leeds 1 were deserved winners, but it was a close contest with Lancaster a close second. This was Leeds ladies fourth consecutive win - once again took maximum points and lifting the league winners trophy. In the boarding competition there were 6 teams, which ran in a league format - all racing each other once on the night.
Manchester were victorious all night and took 1st place, securing them the league trophy, clearly ahead of the rest of the field who had strong individuals, but no team had the depth of Manchester and this proved decisive. Leeds took the crate of Stella for the 'Pet Rescue' theme. The top teams will soon receive invitations to attend finals in the May. When they will be able to compete against the top teams from the other leagues, in skiing, boarding, drinking and fancy dress. Western League In the ski event Bristol 1 had already wrapped up the overall title and Bristol 3 had the luck of the gods with teams falling all around them to win round 4 and make their bid for a place in the finals, Plymouth 1 had their best result of the season finishing in second, and Dan from Plymouth 2 had the fall of the night skiing off the side of the slope and into the pine forest (only to be found later surrounded by bears and bleeding from the rear end) they went on to win the wooden spoon. Swansea 1 had a late season serge to finish a creditable 4th behind Bristol 1, Exeter 1, 5th in the skiing took the fancy dress prize having come as "Grease" T-birds and pink ladies. UWE Bristol Poly had fine fancy dress too but slumped to 6th after expending most of their energy claiming they were a proper university. Cardiff were a poor 7th missing their inspiration - Gemma's sister. 3 ladies teams claimed quality not quantity as Bristol won again securing the overall season title ahead of the welshies and the up and coming UWE birds. The snowboarding was a battle of the Bristols with Poly beating Uni in the final, Plymouth 1 in 3rd took the overall season, Swansea 1 Plymouth 2 and Bristol 2 making up the field. special thanks once again to Owen from Swansea 1 for assisting with the flagging. after a rowdy prize giving where Bristol took a pair of magnificent cups, and much cheap wine and toblerbone was consumed, Plymouths Chris Mattock presented the Kings officials with a real champagne as a goodbye present and a hint for next seasons prizes, then all teams sampled the Plymouth night life until the early hours..........see you all at the finals! Mail
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